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This is exactly what type of tattoo you should get based on your Newcastle Uni halls

TW: Stereotypes, cry about it x

First year is your time to settle into your accommodation, albeit in your own bed or someone else’s. It’s also the year of 100 per cent attendance for clubbing, but scraping 50 per cent for uni. There’s also plenty of room to disappoint your parents by getting a tattoo. With a grand total of four myself, I believe I hold all knowledge and power of people to make horrible decisions that stay with you for life. Committing to a tattoo is surprisingly easier than a relationship (and uni), so pick your poison.

Park View – Birth year tattoo 

Despite living here myself (currently taking autographs at the moment), I can’t help but think the people here are very basic, hence the tattoo. I see the same font of men at least five times a day: tall, brown hair and looks like they do economics. Park View is a popular choice for accommodation, likewise with the birth year tattoo. I see it EVERYWHERE and cannot escape it.

Castle Leazes – ‘Do you go skiing in the alps?’

The people I meet from Leazes feel like a different breed sometimes. They’re mostly blonde, wearing parachute pants and a really strange-looking scarf. It’s really funny to me when some of them are genuinely shocked that I’ve never been skiing. The closest thing I have to that is rolling down a hill in the snow, the next best thing my Dad would argue.

Windsor Terrace – A pair of glasses

Let’s be honest. Nobody knows Windsor Terrace unless you really look – hence the glasses. The booths located in the Phil Rob are probably bigger than the single beds they have to put up with, poor souls.

Portland Green – #parkviewreject

I have never met anyone who reeks of jealousy more when I say I live in Park View. The long walk to and from campus is not ideal but at least you’re getting your steps in guys. To my friends who live there, it literally says on Snap Maps that you live on a Battlefield. My heart goes out to you all during this difficult time x

Newgate Court – ‘Get rich or die trying’

Newgate Court is made for those lucky enough to have a trust fund or a decent student loan. I’d personally be scraping for crumbs to pay the rent they charge there, it’s private too so it probably costs the equivalent of two meal deals to wash your clothes. I’m speaking from a lazy and idle perspective but the walk is too long for my liking, it’s also close to the train station so it’s much easier to run home and cry to your parents about your degree – just me?