Here are the weirdest things students have subjected Edi Deliveroo drivers to

Please, just let us deliver your food

You see a lot of things working for Deliveroo. From the weird and wacky to the just plain traumatising, here are some of the weirdest things Deliveroo drivers have seen in Edinburgh. 

1. ‘Guy in Pollock offered to share food. We ended up going to second base in his room. I’m straight.’

I don’t believe a third of this story. Make up your own mind about which third. 

2. ‘One time someone told me he needed a green card and winked at me’

You give me a £5 tip and you can have all of me, passport and all. 

3. ‘Someone ordering a £10 bubble tea and giving a £15 tip’

Where are my econ bros at? 

4. ‘I delivered a catering order by bike and Peter Mathieson answered the door. No tip’

Brutal from Pete, especially when you’ve already tipped him £9,225 this year. 

5. ‘Made a delivery and then got asked to help carry a pool table up two flights of stairs’

Didn’t know you could order that on Ting Thai. 

6. ‘Address turned out to be a Grassmarket strip club. Had to go inside to deliver’

Because nothing says strip club like chowing down on some cookie dough. 

7. ‘Asked to pretend I was a stripper for a hen do’

Was this the previous customer down on their luck? But trust me, no one wants to see my sweaty boobs I am after lugging your booze up the mound. Come one, shell out for a professional, your best mate’s getting hitched. 

8. ‘Sent me to give doughnuts to his girlfriend cos he was too lazy to do it himself’

There’s a theme developing here. Guys please, WE’RE JUST SUPPOSED TO DELIVER YOUR FOOD! We’re not a fourth emergency service. 

9. ‘A guy invited me inside to show me his snail collection’

Is this a euphemism? Please say it’s a euphemism. 

10. ‘Delivered to a Mormon woman who tried to convert me on the doorstep and give me a bible’

Well, I would have preferred money but hey ho. 

11. ‘The number of people who open the door fully naked is insane’

Sadly that’s the only tip I’m going to see for the rest of the shift. 

12. ‘My favourite order was two bottles of red wine and a box of condoms to an old woman in the lobby of a posh conference centre’

I want to have the confidence of this woman. 

13. ‘Someone asked me to bring their food into a lecture in Gordon Aikman for them’

The amount of laziness you see in this job is insane.

14. ‘Once had to deliver Chinese food to Drumchapel in Glasgow and got invited in to do gear’

Glasgow on a normal one as always. 

15. ‘A mum ordering about 10 litres of alcohol for her daughter the day she finished her exams’

Absolute mothering goals here. Take notes. 

16. ‘I delivered to the Edinburgh Ferret Man’

You win. New deliveroo goal unlocked. My only question is, was it for him or the ferrets?

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