We asked Durham students for their worst landlord stories and some of them are horrifying

Another year of Durham land-LORDS providing royal treatment to students

Often the true housing crisis isn’t finding the house, it’s finding the will to live once the contract is signed and you have to deal with the challenging breed that is the Durham landlord.

We asked the students of Durham to share their landlord horror stories. Let’s delve into some, which are even scarier than the rent prices.

1. ‘We had the full cast of Flushed Away in my house and they did nothing’

Looks like a classic case of a Claypath rat outbreak. I really hope the rats flush away your debt by contributing to your rent payments before returning to the basement of a certain pizza takeaway.

2. ‘Ours died mid contract’

Surely this qualifies for a rent reduction. How can you be expected to pay the ghost of landlord past?

3. ‘Found a fresher climbing up the drain pipe to ask for a house tour’

You should’ve told them to fulfil landlord duties and give it a clean whilst they’re at it. Turn that house tour into housework.

4. ‘He walked in on me naked’

Was he chasing up a late payment by any chance? This definitely puts the “direct” in direct debit.

5. ‘Come get your slugs and racoons’

I’m assuming this is Gilesgate. Bearing that in mind, maybe keep the slugs and racoons for some social interaction considering you basically live in Sunderland.

6. ‘Our house wasn’t liveable for two months and we still had to pay rent’

Forget girl math, this is Durham landlord math at its finest.

7. ‘Broke one of my items then tried to hide it’

This sounds like efficient gaslighting to me. It seems the Durham landlords are now trying everything in their power to make you repay that deposit. Next it will be a (nother) hole in the wall.

8. ‘Mine asked me to pay for his train ticket to Durham to give me the keys to enter the house’

Surely you should know this by now: All landlords deserve royal treatment, even for the bare minimum. They’re called land-LORDS for a reason. Respect the title.

9. ‘Said his feelings were hurt when my housemates sent an email requesting a mop’

Mops are a touchy subject, I get it.

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