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This is exactly what your road on Smithdown says about you as a Liverpool student

Did somebody say Borrowdale BNOCS?

I think it’s time to dismantle the Smithdown social hierarchy and address the most rated roads amongst us. As there’s no documentary featuring the feralnes and secrets of Smithdown this will have to do, I am here to uncover the realities. Sorry in advance. 

The dales: Lidderdale, Borrowdale, Langdale

Let’s be honest- you’re probably a social sec, a BNOC/ BFOC, or friends with someone who is. The uni of students that flood the dales will never miss a sweet treat trip to Mazi Mart and will frequently complain about their location whilst lugging their Aldi shopping back. Being so close to the Brookie is also a bonus, and of course Nomad being right at your feet which is a Smithdown speciality. These roads are definitely up there. You’re quite the legend.

The Aldi vicinities: Woodcroft, Thornycroft, Portman

These roads are envied by the others for sure. You’re in close proximity to Aldi, Asda, uni and being on the doorstep to Love Bar just adds to the superiority. You definitely never miss a Wednesday night out and are probably found gazing out from Hatch Balcony after necking a quad vod, necking someone else, or stumbling around scavenging for a vape to steal. Decks and house parties are also more your brand, but 24 Kitchen Street and Meraki can’t be your personality forever. Sorry. 

The middle grounders: Kenmare, Claremont, Barrington, Blantyre, Gainsborough

These roads are for the realest kings and queens of Smithdown. Being besides Black cat and Kellys heightens these roads’ supremacy as you’re only a two minute ponder back home from the bar. You’re probably a frequent poster on TikTok but when your friends text you it takes three to five days to respond. You’re humble, I like it. Gainsborough, however, you are single handedly the most irritating road on Smithdown. Sorry not sorry. 

The forbidden end of Smithdown: Langton, Alderson, Salisbury and Cranborne

Although you’re winning in the sense that it’s an extremely shorter walk to uni, your roads are quite chaotic. You probably never leave your house without an Elf Bar or an Elux stuffed in your Carhartt bag, and your house definitely has some of the best debriefs. These roads seem to be similar to a social experiment and I’m intrigued to find out what truly happens down this end of Smithdown. 

And for those not living on Smithdown, who may be in Kensington, I only have three words: Is everything okay?

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