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A comprehensive list of my ins and outs for 2024 as a University of York student

Arguing with flatmates about the bins is out


Happy new year! We all know a new year can bring feelings of excitement for new experiences alongside a lot of anxiety about the need to become a whole new person.

Now personally I don’t subscribe to the belief of “new year, new me” as I think it just makes people hate themselves a bit more (which is definitely OUT for 2024). That’s why I was so happy to see that Gen Z has taken a different approach. Instead of unrealistic resolutions of “quitting chocolate forever” or “running a marathon everyday”, they have taken to TikTok and are setting realistic goals of things that are coming in and going out this 2024.

This made me think about what my ins and outs as a York student are this year, so I compiled a list and encourage you to do the same as it is very therapeutic. Although, I think my list may be encouraging more chaos this year than peace but they haven’t called it “2024 the plot” for nothing.

Ins:

More debriefing seshes

I want to encourage more debriefing sessions with the girls, where we all cram into one bed like the grandparents from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and meticulously run through the events from the night before or the new piece of gossip someone heard. I want to be ruthlessly made fun of for my antics and to do the same to them while my belly aches from laughing.

Stupid dance moves

I want to bring back the art of stupid dance moves. I am sick of trying to look remotely good on the dance floor and would much prefer to bring out a few dad dance moves to make my friends laugh. Sorry to the Arctic Monkeys, but this year I think all bets are off on me looking good on the dance floor.

My personal favourite is “the golfer” which entails pretending to do a golf manoeuvre. It’s actually quite freeing when you get into the swing of it (no pun intended).

Taking my degree seriously

My personal favourite is “the golfer” which entails pretending to do a golf manoeuvre. It’s actually quite freeing when you get into the swing of it (no pun intended).

Taking my degree seriously

Thirdly, I need to take my degree a little more seriously and remember I’m here to learn and not just make a tit out of myself in Revs. This year I will go full Ruby Granger mode trying to go to all my lectures and do my essays. Catch me making my dark academia study playlist asap.

Lying to men in clubs for fun

The aforementioned chaos comes into my fourth “in”, which is to lie to men in clubs for fun more. Now I know lying is wrong and I will repent for my sins after third year, however, telling little white lies to baffle men in clubs is very funny. This was inspired from last year when I convinced multiple men I was captain of the women’s basketball team despite the fact I’m 5’1.

And believe the things girls tell me in club toilets

This year I am going to believe all the lovely compliments I get from the drunk girls in the toilet. The girl’s toilet is a sacred place full of love and support. Instead of seeking validation from men this year, I am seeking it from those girls who are very drunk and desperate to compliment anyone that walks through the door. Let’s be honest their opinions of you matter way more than those from a basic white boy from James college.

Outs:

Arguing with your flatmates about the bins

Arguing with your housemates over the bins and recycling. Life is too short to be explaining to grown adults that you need to separate your cardboard from your plastics (sorry to my housemates this is very aimed).

Drinking sambuca shots in Flares

No more sambuca shots. Normally I let Flares rob me blind but their specific brand of sambuca has caused many regrettable events. Although don’t worry Flares, I will still be buying an embarrassing amount of Yeager bombs off you to make up for this profit loss.

Believing TikTok tarot readings

People believing those tarot card readings that pop up on everyone’s TikTok fyp. Brenda from Surrey doesn’t know that you’re going to pass your exams and you’re definitely not going to meet your soulmate in Salvos next Wednesday (sorry hun).

Being that guy in lectures

This ones for that token person everyone has on their course that has an opinion on everything and feels the need to correct the lecturer. Just pipe down and be silently bored like the rest of us please.

Feeling guilty for investing in little treats

Felling guilty for spending money on a little treat if it helps you through the day or a hard assignment. The January blues are real and if a little coffee or a Greggs sausage roll will boost those grey feelings for a little while its worth it.

Whether you choose to adopt some of these ins and outs or make your own, I encourage you to bring more chaos, fun and a disregard for peoples opinions into 2024. I hope you have a very happy new year!

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