Exactly which UK supermarket each Superstore character would work at, based on vibes alone

The way Mateo would THRIVE at Marks & Spencer

As a UK viewer, there’s still a lot about Superstore that I just don’t get. I’ve never stepped foot in a Walmart and I struggle to believe Target is real and isn’t just Cloud 9’s biggest competitor. And as someone who’s never worked in retail, the characters seem wildly unhinged, but my supermarket worker friends have since reassured me that the chaos is all very real. As we don’t have the same shops over here, it seems only natural to imagine all of the Superstore characters working at UK supermarkets and how they’d survive respectively.

Amy – Tesco

via Netflix

I don’t know about you, but I could see Amy thriving in Tesco, arguably the best bog standard UK supermarket. It’s Clubcard deals truly have me in a chokehold. With that perfect balance of a business brain and personality, Amy would run that shop floor with an iron fist. She’d also be more than capable of dealing with the shoplifters who haunt Tesco, as much as we like to pretend it’s an upmarket shop.

Jonah – Waitrose

via Netflix

Being a bit of a snob, Jonah’s life would peak if he landed a job on the shop floor at Waitrose. It’s focus on quality and customer service would appeal to Jonah’s values and his tendency to go above and beyond and he would definitely thrive in that green apron.

Garrett – Sainsbury’s

via Netflix

Sainsbury’s is very much cruising in the middle lane when it comes to class and affordability. It’s definitely become more upmarket and the big Sainsbury’s I’ve been to are absolutely huge, so would definitely benefit from him on the announcements. Orange would also look great on him.

Dina – ASDA

via Netflix

Dina’s strict, no-nonsense approach to her job and her focus on store security align with ASDA’s values down to a T. Known for its competitive pricing and busy environment, Dina would be the breath of fresh air the supermarket needed. With her approved work  hairstyle and crisp polo. She’d be assistant CEO in no time.

Cheyanne – B&M Bargains

Cheyenne’s youthful energy and friendliness would be a good match for B&M Bargains, often frequented by school children looking to spend their lunch money on American sweets. Despite predominately manning the make-up counter, her time as floor supervisor proved how she can do it all, so navigating everything from the gardening aisle to the soup cans would be a piece of cake for her.

Glenn – Lidl

via Netflix

Glenn is a family man who loves no one more than his kids and his wife, except possibly Amy. That being said, he is pretty erratic and would apply to be a manager at Lidl simply so he could have first dibs to the middle aisle before anyone else. He would definitely max out his Lidl Plus card and put himself, Jerusha and the clan into debt over his impulse juice spending though.

Mateo – Marks & Spencer

via Netflix

Mateo’s ambition and desire for the finer things in life would make him Marks & Spencer’s dream employee. He’d be able to assist in not only clothing, but food and homeware too. He’d also love any excuse to ditch the vest for a shirt and tie.

Marcus – Netto

via Netflix

Netto died a sad death years ago, but our man Marcus would single handedly bring this relic back if he had the chance. He’s very much a hands on kind of guy, so he’d be more than capable of putting in the necessary graft to nurse this supermarket out of administration and back to health.

Sandra – Iceland

via Netflix

Sandra is always on the go and is ready to take on anything. That kind of determination makes her the perfect fit to work at Iceland, as being around those freezers all day is bound to take a toll on your spirit. It also might be nice for her to experience being in some kind of extreme temperatures seeing as she’s never been to the beach.

For more like this explainer on all of the Superstore characters at UK supermarkets and all the latest TV news, drops, quizzes and memes, like The Holy Church of Netflix on Facebook. 

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Featured image via Netflix