What your takeaway dish says about you
Don’t be boring
Takeaway food has now taken a turn for the better – we’re willing to pay a little more for our favourite, exotic classics like Vietnamese noodles and gourmet burgers.
Here’s what your favourite takeaway dish says about you.
Sweet and Sour Chicken
After looking at the options for half an hour, you realise the fear of getting something you don’t know and hating it is too great. Sweet and sour chicken is reliable, comfortable and everyone’s secret favourite. New experiences are over-rated.
Half Crispy Duck and Pancakes
You like the sophisticated high life wherever you are, anytime of the day or night. While most would only go for this at 7pm at a restaurant, you don’t care. 2am after a night out? You’ll still go for a dish that requires assembling because you’re that much of a foodie. Everyone applauds your effort.
Pad Thai
Oooh did you go to Thailand? You’re about to tell me about how you knew a guy on the Khao San Road and you guys made friends, and he wore a little pink apron and gave you extra beansprouts.
Chow Mein
Are you one of those people who can’t use chopsticks? Does your mum still iron your shirts? Are you disappointed with the way life is turning out, with the risks you never took, all the chances and opportunities that have slipped through your flailing, papery hands? Do you look at the screen you’ve been staring at for hours and ever question what exactly you’re becoming? No you don’t do you? Because you’ve become the one who orders Chow Mein.
Chicken Katsu Curry
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Your order never changes, you know what you want and who can blame you for that? You’re also the type of person who loves Pumpkin Spiced Lattes and listening to Ed Sheeran – but that’s alright. Some may say basic, you just say good taste.
Beef Burger with bacon
Always a crowd pleaser, nothing beats that mouth-watering beef and crispy bacon, paired with some blue cheese and avocado if you’re feeling adventurous. The simple beef burger with bacon is a winning combination and it’s versatile to a huge range of accompaniments.
Bean Burger
You’re desperately trying to be healthy but in denial of the fact that what they are truly craving is a succulent and meaty burger. You just can’t quite give up on the idea entirely so you settle on a hybrid. If not, you’re simply a veggie ordering the only this that’s available to you on the menu.
Chicken Ramen
You’re not afraid to go bold. Noodles, soup and chicken, who said you couldn’t have it all? You’re not ashamed to slurp up that ramen with all your mates watching that salty soupy liquid running down your chin. You don’t care – “Carpe Diem” is your motto. Why on earth settle for one dish when you can have three in one?
Prawn crackers
You’ve maxed out your overdraft and you’re bloody starving. So when bumout Mollie and her mates from next door get a Chinese, you’re in there. Chomping away, thinking you’re all sly while they spill sweet’n’sour sauce all down themselves. The sound of you crunching is only covered up by Hannah’s crying because she didn’t get with a guy again.
Margherita Pizza
You’re unsure about leaving your comfort zone. Your palette hasn’t matured yet to taste the fine arrays of flavours on offer – like crumbled goats cheese or pungent gorgonzola. Some label you “fussy” but why be adventurous when you can keep it plain and simple? Risks nearly always result in regret you tell yourself – you can’t go wrong with the humble Margherita.
Veggie Pizza
You know right, when you want a pizza, you just want to treat yourself but you don’t want to go the whole hog. Pepperoni? That’s not treat night. You’d feel so bad after. But a veggie pizza? That’s not even a cheat meal.
Sushi
If your only experience of sushi is from Tesco Express then you can seriously do better. Extra points if you correctly pronounce Onigiri and Sashimi when you order.
Burrito
Burritos are not a new phenomenon, stop pretending like they are. A meal that was once the reserve of stoners and Mexicans has been adopted by Radio 4 listening hipsters.
Falafel Wrap
That soggy wrap you bought from a foreign sounding man at a market isn’t falafel. Falafel done properly is a beautiful thing. With a well made pitta in hand, you’re telling the world that you’re a well-travelled adventurer, unmoved by the complex world of geopolitics.