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If you did 19/24 of these things during summer you’re officially too posh to function
It’s time for you poshos to be exposed
With Britain’s not so sunny summer coming to a rapid end, it’s time to look back at what posh plans you were getting up to. You’ve had three months to forget uni exists and live your summer dream. Whether you’ve sipped endless cocktails, paid for front row seats at every concert or haven’t even spent a day in England, you’re only posh if you have ticked off 19/24 of these things.
Best believe you’re getting judged on this one. Will you embrace the fact that you radiate mega Tory energy or simply refuse to accept it?
1. Bought a double at Ibiza Rocks
@anoushkachadha whoever owns that club is laughing at us🥲 #ibiza #ibizaholiday #ibizaclub #ibizaclubs #hiibiza #hiibizaclub #ibizaprice #ibiza2023 #holiday
Ibiza has become the holiday purely for Instagram influencers and celebs, welcoming the likes of Leonardo DiCaprio, Justin Bieber and regulars such as Chloe Ferry. And it’s prices truly reflect its customers. I’ll just stick to two doubles for a fiver in Magaluf, thanks.
2. Cruised around the world
Whether you have explored the Greek islands, been a tourist in Barcelona or relaxed on the Miami beaches, it’s set you back a few thousand this summer. But you’ve barely noticed a change to your bank account, and have already paid for next year’s trip.
3. Travelled around Europe
Rather than roughing it backpacking round Europe, jumping from hostel to hostel, you’ve lived it up in the snazziest five star hotels, with 24 hour room service to accommodate all your needs.
4. Retired to your second home
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Ahh the luxury of escaping this hell hole for the whole of summer. Let’s face it, the second you’re bored of being in England you just hop on your private jet and fly away to your villa in Spain. You’re waiting for the day when that luxury house will be passed onto you. You already have plans to retire there when you’re older.
5. Went ‘glamping’ at a festival
The chaos of the bank holiday festival season comes to an end. If you paid that bit extra for glamping last weekend, you certainly have some bank. You probably also think you are better than the rest of us who have to rough it with mud slides, tents on fire and the annual disappearance of Alan.
6. Still let your parents fund your holiday
You still play the child card and persuaded your parents to fund all your holidays.
7. Attended a wedding abroad
This wasn’t just any wedding, but a trip only for the rich.
8. You went on your jet ski
You can’t stop bragging about owning a jet ski. Get over it.
9. You held a house party while your parents went abroad
You had the mansion to yourself so obviously threw the biggest party of the year
10. Had a mid week dinner at the Ivy
You could never imagine cooking a meal for yourself, daily wining and dining is the way to go.
11. Been on more than three holidays
You’ve basically travelled to every country at this point
12. Already booked your Christmas holiday
You always need your next holiday booked to remind yourself you’re not trapped in one country
13. Driven to the Lake District
You probably took your vintage car out for a weekend away in the lakes. Log cabins and pure peacefulness.
14. Visited a spa
Your life is way too stressful not having to worry about money. You have my sympathy.
15. Went to America
You still believe it’s the land of dreams
16. Changed your room decor for uni
Out with the old, in with the new. This is a yearly must for you.
17. Clothes shopped at Selfridges
You will only ever wear designer outfits. What’s Vinted?
18. Treated yourself to some jewellery
Real gold and silver, of course.
19. Sat front row at a concert
It’s front row or you simply refuse to go.
20. Worked in your dad’s company
Not long until you become CEO of his business.
21. Shopped at John Lewis’ uni range
22. Had your hair done at least three times
You’ve become addicted to paying other people to style your hair.
23. Watched Barbie in your private cinema
And turned it into the ultimate pink themed slumber party.
24. You’ve lost count of the number of afternoon tea’s you’ve had
A glass of fizz, a scone or two and delicate sandwiches are your soft spot.
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