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It’s time to argue: Here are five reasons why South Leam is better than North

You can fight amongst yourselves

Ah, the age old debate, the North/South divide. Which is better? Whose ends remain elite? And no, I’m not writing about Manchester vs London, I’m writing about North vs South Leamington. Whilst I could write a whole other article about where to draw the boundary between North and South, for the sake of this article, everything below Viallis is classed as South Leamington. My two years of living so far south that I technically live in Whitnash has given me an expert knowledge of life there. Sorry to those who live in North Leam, I’m about to destroy your god complex, because South Leam is well and truly superior.

1. Rent is a huge factor

Who doesn’t love saving money? I know I do, and you don’t have to give up the Leam lifestyle in order to save rent. Just move south. After a short browse at some student houses up for rent in Leamington, it’s clear that South Leam is the cheaper of the two, with an average rent of £109.94pppw compared to £146.88pppw in the north. To put that into perspective, that’s 24 j-bombs in Kasbah. Also, having visited many friends across Leamington, you get more bang for your buck in the South, as the houses feel much less cramped.

2. Abundance of Kebab shops

POV: It’s 3am, you and your flatmates are walking back to your North Leam house after a night in Smack. In this ghastly scenario, you know that the only thing that would make you happy would be a portion of cheesy chips. Well, I’m sorry to break it to you but that will not be possible, as the kebab shop selection above Jephson Gardens is very limited. However, change that North Leam house to one in the South, and you can satisfy all of your cheesy chip cravings. We have Viallis, Spicy Bites, Sakarya Kebab House, GS Chicken and Chips, and more all within a stones throw of each other. You will never have to worry about going without cheesy chips ever again.

3. Every other type of shop

3. Every other type of shop

4. You gain an appreciative eye

Whilst I’ll argue to the death that South Leam is superior, I can hold my hands up and say that it is by no means pretty. Whilst beauty is subjective, and South Leam is beautiful in its own unique kind of way, it can be pretty much stated as a fact that North Leam does win some points where aesthetics are concerned. However, don’t let this distract you from the question at hand here. South Leam remains superior because it allows you to appreciate the beauty of North Leam. If you live in North Leam, and see it all day, every day, you begin to lose appreciation for it and become blind to its beauty. However, living in the (ugly) South, you are able to appreciate the beauty in Leamington more, as you don’t have the privilege of looking outside of your window and seeing the aesthetics of North Leam.

5. Buses will make or break you

Last, but by no means least, the hill I will die on. The biggest appeal of South Leam: the buses. If you’re a second year who has just moved to North Leam, as the weeks pass by, you will come to realise that, no, the buses will never not be busy in the mornings. You will always have to fight to get on the bus at Parish Church, and I pity the fool who even considers attempting to get on the bus above Parish Church. However, if you live in South Leam, you never have that problem. I sleep well at night knowing that I will always be able to get on the bus. There is nothing more satisfying than driving past all the people waiting to get on the U1 at Upper Parade. I know that some North Leam residents will argue that the bus journey is longer, and it is, but only by five minutes. I don’t know about you, but I would rather spend five extra minutes on the bus than spend 30 trying to get on it in the first place.

Whilst I am not able to solve the North/South divide of the country, I can definitely solve the Leamington divide. South Leamington is clearly the superior of the two, and if you don’t think so, how many of your friends moved further South in third year, after spending their second year in the North? That’s what I thought.

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