If you signed up to any of these 10 uni societies, then you probably went to private school

After showing up to freshers’ fair for the free pizza, you’ve then got to make the difficult decision of picking which societies you feigned interest in to actually show up to. Here are the 10 uni societies with the vibes of a private school. Go forth and use it as a guide of societies to stay clear of, if you want to avoid people with egos even larger than their savings accounts.

Lacrosse

I am convinced that everyone who plays lacrosse is a malicious masochist and nobody can change my mind. Very few schools in the UK play lacrosse/lax/lackey/that godawful game in Wild Child, so if a fresher is really good at it, then they probably went to a school so posh that it had the budget to send students to Canada for extra practice.

Clay shooting

Because when funding comes through the Student Union, you have to pretend you only shoot fake animals.

Polo

It’s obviously very middle class to own your own horse. But to play polo, you’ve got to know at least seven other people with their own horses. That’s a whole other level of poshness.

@thetab.exeter

Were passing the mic to the best student media on campus (Us) 😍 #fyp #exeter #freshers #societies #campus #exeteruniversity #university #student

♬ original sound – The Tab Exeter

Pilates 

You don’t actually need more than a YouTube video and floor space to give pilates a go. But signing up for spenny pilates classes is giving the energy of yummy mummies who buy bulgur wheat at Waitrose in Wimbledon.

Chamber orchestra

Playing your violin in a Cambridge college’s Tudor chapel adds an extra level of rah

Getting a Grade eight distinction for a fancy-sounding instrument like the trumviolalone takes a lot of expensive music lessons and even more pushy parenting.

Sailing

Most Read

Sionainn addresses why she keeps shaking on MAFS UK and it’s not what you might expect

The glow-ups of the Love Is Blind season seven cast will have you on a flight to D.C.

The wages of the current Love Is Blind cast before the show prove who should want a prenup

An essential skill for when you take the new sloop for a spin at Granny’s Cornwall house this summer.

Ballroom dancing

Strictly Come Dancing is objectively the most Tory TV show. Richard Osman said so on this podcast, so it must be true. The outfits alone for ballroom dancing cost so much money that you’ve got to be fairly middle class to do it.

Wine tasting

No, that’s not a joke. There legitimately are wine tasting societies at the London School of Economics and Political Science (LSE), the University of Oxford, University College London (UCL), the University of Cambridge, the University of Edinburgh, Durham University, and pretty much every other fancy Russell Group uni.

To appreciate all the floral leather undertones of an Argentinian whatever, you’ve got to have been raised on something other than the Barefoot rosé you find on the bottom shelf of supermarkets.

Tory society

This is self explanatory. If anyone under the age of 50 is already voting Tory, then imagine how right wing their views will be by the time they’re retired. *Shudders*.

@thetabcardiff

Pass the 🎤 at the frehers fair #freshers2024 #cardiffuni #thetab #fresher #cardiffsu

♬ original sound – The Tab Cardiff

The Durham Champagne Society

This would surely take the prize as having more private school kids than all other uni societies. The Durham Champagne Society hasn’t held one of its notorious summer balls – which The Telegraph described as “a drunken, drug-fuelled orgy” – for a couple of years. But the society still hosts events throughout the year. You’ve got to be pretty rah to sign up for them.

Related articles recommended by this author:

• The 10 best UK private schools based on grades, and how tragically expensive they all are
• It’s official: These 30 universities are crawling with the most private school students in 2024
• 24 things only the most posh and rah freshers will have in their uni room