Every cringey compliment Luke has given to Amy so far on MAFS UK, ranked by ick factor

Amy said she wanted to find a “prince charming” on MAFS UK, and Luke is definitely laying the charm on thick. MAFS UK viewers are split over whether Luke de Bono’s comments about Amy should be classed as complimentary, or just really cringe.

I’m sure lots of these lines are very beautiful in Luke’s first language, Maltese. But British girls are used to compliments with all the poetry of “you have a nice bum”, so recoil when a man actually says something nice. Luke talks like a middle-aged woman made him up for a trashy romantasy novel.

All of Luke’s pick-up lines seem to be successfully wearing Amy down, because the couple looked pretty happy together at that trainwreck of a dinner party.

So, here are all of Luke’s cringiest compliments to Amy so far on MAFS UK, ranked by how much they give the ick.

14. ‘When I first turned around and I saw a beautiful smile, elegant flow coming towards me, it just felt like a lighthouse with its full beam guiding me home.’

When does he have the time to come up with all of these? Does he sit there on the sofa writing them down in his Notes app?

13. ‘Water and fire. I need to cool off! I don’t know who would win. You’d boil me. Steam me up’

I know a lot of Channel 4 viewers got the ick from Luke’s comments about star signs (fyi, Luke is a Pisces, a water sign, and Amy is an Aries, a fire sign). However, this is a pretty accurate analysis of their zodiac compatibility, so this is one of the few compliments which makes sense to me.

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12. ‘I can look at her and feel really warm inside. I’m not a doctor but I know she’s good for my circulation.’

I’m not a doctor either, but I don’t think that’s how science works.

11. ‘I’m not sure which I like best, the pineapple or your lips’

Amy wasn’t super happy at happy hour
(Image via Channel 4)

Luke dropped this line when he and Amy were drinking cocktails out of pineapples on their MAFS UK honeymoon in the Bahamas. Luke looked very pleased with himself for thinking of it. Amy laughed awkwardly (always the answer when you don’t know how to react).

10. ‘What do you like to do? Apart from looking amazing, showing off your clavicles…’

Yes, because possessing collarbones is a hobby now.

9. ‘She’s just magical. Just beautiful. Just very gorgeous. From the Garden of Eden.’

Luke complimenting his bride when she’s nervous is a green flag. I’m just deeply confused by “from the Garden of Eden”. Is he trying to say that he wishes she was naked the whole time? That she looks like she eats a lot of fruit? That she’s a snake? Somebody with an theology degree needs to help me out here.

8. ‘For me, love is the first person I want to see when I open my eyes, and the last one before I close them.’

I don’t get it.

7. ‘Just hold it like you’re holding a chorizo, and you’re taking off the cover when it comes from the supermarket.’

Amy looks as confused as we are
(Image via Channel 4)

This was Luke’s instruction for when Amy was massaging his triceps. Promise.

6. ‘You know Aladdin’s cave? Once you go in and it’s all dark, and then there’s only one thing that you can have, it’s like I found that lamp inside of you, and I don’t want to touch anything else.’

Mate, just stick to “you seem nice”. You don’t have to go on for ten minutes or make any overly elaborate comparisons to Disney movies.

Amy laughed nervously and said, “I’ve never been referred to as a lamp before.” Luke promised, “Even if it’s not shiny, we’ll polish it.”

5. ‘You’ve done a great job with her, and I just want to commend you.’

I get that it’s traditional to compliment your bride’s parents on her wedding day, but it’s a bit weird to say it to her dad when you’ve known both of them for all of two hours. It was just a bit much.

4. ‘I think the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, if you ask me’

It’s just a a bit much
(Image via Channel 4)

This line wasn’t for Amy, but for Amy’s mother. Luke told Amy’s mum how pretty her daughter is, then leaned in close and whispered this to her. She joked that Amy, “gets her good looks from me, you see.” Maybe they should get a room?

3. ‘I eat with my eyes, so I’m already full.’

Maybe this sounds really beautiful in Maltese. It doesn’t in English.

2. The poem

It was cute for Luke to spend all that time on the poem so he could tell Amy how much he likes her. But I don’t think the actual poem will be winning any literary prizes.

“Remember how strange it was when we first met?

“Ask my wife, She’ll tell you that.

“Memories that last a lifetime we’ve had,

“Darling, we’ve been to the Bahamas. Are you mad?

“Your spirit goes at 100mph,

“Almost as fast as that waiter we saw shaking your amaretto sour.

“For us, it’s not the apartments and what comes after

“And together we will bring more joy and laughter.

“I just want you to know that at my zoo

“There will always be a table for two.

“Your husband.”

1. ‘It was difficult, because I felt like it’s as close as I can get without, you know, breaking the first commandment. Thou shalt not enter the holy city until the Sabbath.’

This comment was about Luke cuddling Amy in bed, but Amy not being ready to do anything else. I will leave it open to your interpretation.

For all the latest MAFS UK 2024 cast member news, scandals, gossip and updates – like The Holy Church of MAFS on Facebook. 

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Cover image via Channel 4